everything is in a constant state of change when being a mother. from infant to toddler. sitting to standing. breast feeding to solid foods. and now I embark on a huge journey with little miss B – potty training!
I’ve read the other mommy blogs – you can potty train your child in a weekend just like I did. better yet, I did such an amazing job on potty training my 6 month old that you can purchase my new book which has all of my secrets and witches spells that you too can do in the privacy of your own home. good grief!
I thought – I use the potty, my baby is relatively intelligent, how hard can it be? those are some famous last words.
let me say, child birth was a far easier experience than trying to engage B to use the potty. I did the no diaper, run around the house naked all weekend thing. first of all, my kid has the strongest bladder of any human known to man. in 2 days she peed twice. granted both times were on the floor but I digress. I put B on the potty every 15 minutes to get her excited, asking her is she had to go pee or poop. I’d give her a gummy bear as a reward for sitting on the potty. we’d talk. we’d laugh. she’d throw tissues in the potty. but no bodily functions were emitted in said potty.
generally after one of our sitting on the potty sessions trying to coax her to go B would inevitably pee or poop on the floor. it was both weird and gross. even my little, chronically obese dog was horrified. B didn’t pee or poop on the floor when she was an infant. but now she does? I had the awful flashes of her in the future, 16 and peeing behind my couch like some feral mountain child. I hoped to potty train in a weekend and all I did was shred my nerves and give myself an anxiety attack.
after a Xanax I decided to chill a little. who said your 21 month old had to be potty trained in a weekend? surely not me! I realized I need to stop comparing myself to other moms and do work works for me and B. so maybe we’ll get a little more focused on potty training when B turns 2 and she is more ready. maybe we’ll practice using the potty each day. no one said it was going to be easy, but no one said pushing myself into a manic episode to accomplish my toddler’s milestone was necessary either. together B and I will accomplish potty training at our own pace.